It was a busy morning to start a busy day. In preparation for a leadership retreat I was leading, I spent the morning running errands, marking things off my many lists, creating new lists so that I didn't forget anything. But for all of my lists, I did forget something.
I was in Michael's buying beads for a reflective craft project to incorporate into the retreat. This was one of those projects where I had an idea in my head to do one thing, but that idea ended up being financially impossible. So, I spent about 45 minutes in Michael's walking up and down the same 3 aisles, trying to figure out what I was going to do. And today was the day the decision had to be made. I had procrastinated long enough. This was it.
Through the help of the Holy Spirit, an idea was formed, a good, meaningful creative idea. I started gathering the supplies, mentally calculating how much this burst of creativity was going to cost my budget, using the calculator on my cell phone to determine how much of each product I would need. I had so many thought processes going through my head that I'm surprised any of it came out right. In the midst of this, I'm answering emails as they come to my phone, having a conversation with a friend from church who was also shopping, and handling several phone calls from students and coworkers (because heaven forbid I leave campus for a bit without someone needing to track me down).
As I prepared to head for the checkout counter, I remembered that I would need small resealable bags to put all of the pieces for this project in for each student who would participate. I dreaded having to make another stop. I had just left Wal-Mart, and even though it was just across the street, I didn't want to return. Dollar General was my next idea as I thought it would be quicker. As I zoomed toward the front of the store, the jewelry aisle that I had been up and down so many times that morning caught my eye. They had small resealable jewelry bags, 100 for $1.49. They were just the perfect size, and this purchase would eliminate my need for that dreaded extra stop. I put a packet of bags into my shopping basket and proceeded to the front of the store.
Somewhere between that moment, paying for my items, loading them in my car, and leaving the shopping center, I forgot that I had bought the bags. I got back onto the main highway and suddenly "remembered" that I needed to go by Dollar General to buy the bags. I quickly maneuvered across three lanes of traffic, turned into a local restaurant parking lot, and exited on the other side onto the road adjacent to the Dollar General. I parked my car, walked into the store, had to seek assistance from an associate as to where the bags were, and as soon as I touched the box, it all came flooding back. I realized that my forgetfulness caused me to make an extra stop. I already had bags. And surprisingly, they were cheaper at Michael's. I had a quick laugh at myself, put the box back on the shelf, and exited the store. I guess the best way to describe how I was feeling is the word amissed (a cross between amused and pissed...thank you Art Hartzog for that creation).
I had wasted precious time, but I couldn't help but see the humor in the situation. I was so consumed by my need to get things done, to move forward, by my busyness, that I forgot something so minuscule yet so important.
Later that night, I was sitting in our campus worship service, Overflow, and it was as if God hit me over the head with the true lesson from this little exercise in forgetfulness. How often do I "forget" God's truth? How often do I trade it for a truth of my own making for convenience sake?
How often do I forget God's mercies? I complain about my life, my job, and everything else in the world, all the while forgetting how blessed I am and how much He loves me. I forget that his love is unconditional, and that love extends to everyone, not just the ones I find worthy!
How often do I forget that I've laid my sin at God's feet? Instead of letting it be there and letting Him take care of it, I find a way to sneak back to that altar (although I'm not really sneaking at all considering I serve an omniscient and omnipresent God) to pick it up and carry it around like a medal for all to see. I do the same thing with my worries, my heartache, and my fears.
Just like I forgot that I had already purchased the resealable bags and went out of my way, wasting time and energy, to get what I already had, I forget what God has done for me through Jesus. I so often temporarily "forget" what God has done for me through the gift of salvation. I live my life as if that doesn't matter at all.
I don't want to forget these things, even if just for a crazy moment! I must be more diligent in spending time in God's word. I must be more diligent in spending time in prayer. I must love the things that He loves and despise the things He despises. I must keep my focus on Him and not be held captive to sin. I must fix my eyes on Jesus, the one who wrote the story of my life and my salvation. He has not and never will forget me!
Hallelujah that I serve a God that never forgets and forgives me when I do!
5 years ago
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