God is Real

I wish everyone I know or am acquainted with who doubts God could have been in my kitchen last night and experienced the love of the Lord like I did last night. There is a Christian song that has these words:

All of me, on my knees
Singing holy, holy
Somehow all that matters now
Is you are holy, holy

I fully understand that like I never have before. You see, God has been revealing something to me over the past month of so, and I'm only getting to see bits of pieces of whatever God is doing. And that's not out of some sadistic pleasure God gets from only showing me a little bit at the time. I believe it's because God is showing me only what he has equipped me to handle and understand right now. And that's okay. I take great comfort in the love of a God who knows those things and isn't throwing it all at me at once, AND a God who is daily teaching and equipping me to handle the next step. I don't know what lies ahead, and my greatest fear last night was that I was going to start down my own path, a path based on what I see, instead of walking by faith and letting God show me the next step.

I cried out to him in anguish, and boy did he answer. I described it to a friend like those medical shows where they jab a sharp object into someones chest cavity to relieve the pressure during a heart attack (don't know if that's medically accurate, but that's what I see on TV). It was like that last night. I was standing over God's word, crying out to him to make me obedient, yelling that I didn't understand, and immediately, a peace washed over me. My breathing calmed, what felt like a balloon in my chest seemed to slowly deflate back to normal size. But it was more than a physical peace. It was deep inside of me, my God assuring me that He is Sovereign, He is in control, and He will be faithful in showing me the next step!

I fell to my knees, right there in the kitchen and worshiped my Heavenly Father. There was no other response, no other option. I had to fall face down before my holy God! He is real. He is true. He is faithful. And my priority is to make that known!!!

I serve a God who has called me by name, who summons me, who has designated me as his own. I don't have to be afraid. I don't have to doubt his faithfulness. He is seated on His throne and in control!

I found great comfort from the words of the prophet Isaiah last night:

I call you by your name. I name you, though you do not know me. I ma the Lord and there is no other, besides me there is no God; I equip you, though you do not know me, that people may know, from the rising of the sun and from the west, that there is none besides me; I am the Lord, and there is no other. I form light and create darkness. I make well-being and create calamity, I am the Lord who does all these things. Isaiah 45:4-7

A Word from the Lord

A word from the Lord that I needed to hear this morning:

The goal is make Him known!

Childhood Vacations

Someone asked me recently what my favorite vacation as a child was. I didn't really know how to answer that question. You see, for most families, vacation is something that happens once or twice a year, an event planned months in advance that includes travel to places unknown. Not for my family, though. It was not uncommon for my dad to decide on Thursday evening that we were going to North Carolina for the weekend. It didn't even have to be a 3 days weekend. And we lived in South Georgia...it's not like North Carolina was just a hop, skip, and a jump away. We would leave on Friday afternoon, drive as far as we could, spend the night, wake up early and drive the rest of the way, spend Saturday and Sunday going to all of our favorite places and finding new ones, and leaving Sunday afternoon for a long ride home. These trips were great fun, and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

We rarely took special vacations, and if we did, they usually coincided in some way with a conference my dad had to attend for work. One of the things that amazes me about working with college students is that every now and then I'll come across a student who has never stayed in a hotel before. This always catches me by surprise. I mean, by the time I was 10, I had stayed in my fair share. They weren't always the best, rarely 5 star. I do remember this one time getting to stay at the Ritz Carlton at Amelia Island because of a meeting my dad was attending (one of our family vacation, ahem). I remember it because they put dark chocolates on the pillow, and I found the housekeeping cart and raided a few extra chocolates. I also remember coming back to our room one day and finding a fruit basket. My dad wouldn't let us touch it. Some insurance company that was trying to woo him for his business had sent it. My dad had no intention of using them, so he didn't think it was ethical of us to enjoy the fruit. That was so not fair! Most of my hotel stays were places like the Holiday Inn or Ramada Inn. As long as they had a pool, I was good to go. And a TV in the room...we weren't allowed to have such at home, so hotels were great for that reason alone. My friend Teresa's little boy is so excited this week because they are going on vacation to Charlotte. Now, Charlotte is only about 45 minutes away, but it makes it vacation because they are staying in a hotel. Just think if parents realized this about kids. They could save lots of money on vacations by just going to the next town over and staying in a hotel. Their kids would never know the difference!

Now, before the hotel stays, in days where my parents were either poor or cheap (a little of both I think) there was camping. Knowing what I know about my mom now, it is hard for me to believe she ever did this willingly, but she did. I wish I remembered more about this days, but honestly, I only have bits and pieces. I was so young. What I do remember is that those are some of the best times of my childhood. Speaking of saving money...but I don't know that it would be such an easy sell for today's youth. There's no technology (at least in the type of camping I'm talking about), you go to bed early, wake up early. The fun is in learning to set up the tent, hear ghost stories from your dad, laughing when your parent's air mattress deflates in the middle of the night, trying to find the bathhouse in the dark, cooking outside, playing games as a family, and really just talking to one another. Wow, I think I want to go camping now!

I was talking with a friend today about cars today and all of the technology perks people look for. Don't DVD players and TVs keep kids and parents from talking to one another, just on trips from school to home, not to mention on long drives like vacations. Part of the fun on those long drives were all the games you played to keep yourself entertained, like the Find the Alphabet on the street signs game, I-Spy, or Cows (apparently this was a Day family thing that only works when traveling in rural areas with lots of cow pastures and cemeteries!). Catching up on my reading was also a great car ride activity. And listening to music together as a family. What fun is it if everyone can hear their own thing? My childhood would not have been the same without Psalty the singing songbook tapes. I still know most of the words to those songs! And when we had listened to all of our tapes multiple times, we resorted to singing together, you know the silly songs, the nursery rhymes. How sad is it that we will have a generation of young adults who will never know these simple pleasures in life.

So what was my favorite vacation as a child? Well, I can list a few.

1. Trips to Hendersonville/Asheville: I'm lumping all of these many trips together. One of the best parts was staying at the Holiday Inn with the indoor pool. It's not even a Holiday Inn now, and it looks pretty shabby on the outside, but as a child, it was heaven on earth! The also had an indoor hot tub. And it was right next to the World of Clothing. A trip to Hendersonville was not complete without a visit there, but I'm talking old school World of Clothing, not the current version. Oh, and shopping right across the street at the Picture Me outlet. So much fun to get new clothes every year! And eating at Jimmy's! I so wish that Italian restaurant was still in business. It was only the best place ever! I remember one specific trip where we went to the Biltmore House. We were going on a Sunday afternoon, after church (you see my family still went to church, even when we were out of town), and I didn't want to go in my Sunday dress. I cried and cried. I'm sure I was quite annoying to my family, and I've apologized profusely to my mom and dad now that I'm an adult. We also ate at the Deer Park Restaurant inside of Biltmore. Because I had such a sour attitude that day, I pouted that I would find nothing to eat. My mom promised me there would be a hamburger on the menu, but she was wrong. Truly, the only thing I would eat (or could pronounce) from the menu was Broccoli and Cheese soup. I think about that experience every time I see Broccoli and Cheese soup to this day! Every now and then we'd stay at some different place, a cottage or B&B. Those were fun times, too. Favorite trips often revolved around the Apple Festival in September and a visit to the Sky Top Apple Orchard. I still love going there, and lucky for me, it's only 45 minutes away!

2. Nantahala Village: Now I know this seems awfully close to Hendersonville and Asheville, but this was one of those rare planned vacations. We spent several days there. We stayed in a stone cabin, went horseback riding and my sister's horse almost went off the mountain. We went gem mining! It was a great vacation, and one I've never forgotten.

3. Illinois: When I was around 13, my mom got a call one Sunday morning from a lady who told her she was her sister. She also told her she had a total of 8 other siblings. This was news to my mom, and we planned a trip that summer to meet these new family members. Their family home was in rural Illinois, so everyone gathered there for a weekend. I got to meet my biological grandfather for the first time and found out I had lots of new aunts, uncles, and cousins. I remember catching fireflies in jars, eating watermelon, playing until it got dark and we were forced to come inside, hearing their family stories, and marveling at how much my mom looked like her new found sisters. It was a great trip and introduced me to a whole new side of my life.

4. Oklahoma: I turned 7 in Oklahoma. My dad had to go to a meeting in Texas, so my mom and her friend, Ms. Sue, drove us out to Oklahoma where my grandparents were living at the time. I remember seeing a guy driving in circles on the road on the way and learning that Ms. Sue was deathly afraid of driving/riding over bridges! We had so much fun there. One of the best memories is when my cousin Michael, who was either in his late teens or early 20s at the time was given the task of babysitting us kids while our parents and grandparents went for a walk. Michael decided to take us to the park down the street. It had been raining that week, so around the merry go round a the park was a big moat of water. I got on and Michael started running around, making us spin. I fell off into the water. He was so scared that my mom was going to be mad that he made us rush home and try to give me a bath before they made it back. But as we came up the road towards the house from one direction, my mom and everyone was coming up from the other direction. He was so funny about that, and the funny thing was, my mom didn't seem to care!

5. The House Boat ride: My parents decided that we would rent a house boat and spend a few days floating down the Suwanee River. I guess they were trying to help us feel like Stephen Foster! What made this so exciting was the fact that we got stuck in the middle of the river one afternoon on a sand bar. We had to spend the night there. I still have this clear image in my head of my dad getting up really early that morning to dig us out with a broom handle!

6. Bardstown, Kentucky: This was a place we went several years in a row and one of the places we would camp at. We always went to see the outdoor musical drama of the Stephen Foster story. We went back just a few years ago. It was as spectacular as I remember as a child! The ladies in their pretty dresses, dancing with umbrellas, singing some of my favorite songs such as Beautiful Dreamer, Old Dog Trey, Old Folks at Home, and more! These trips helped solidify my love for musical theater and my need for my life to be like a musical!

7. Philadelphia: My dad served as the president for a local civic group one year, and he had to attend the national convention of this group. So, that became our family vacation. We rode the train all the way from Georgia to Philadelphia. We did all of the touristy things, stayed in a really nice hotel (paid for by someone else where the hamburgers were more expensive than the ones on the train), ate breakfast at Burger King every morning, and had the best clam chowder ever made at Wanamaker's Department store. I love American history, so this trip was perfect for me. I've been back to Philadelphia several times, but nothing will ever beat that first trip.

I'm sure there are more, but these are the ones that stand out the most. The crazy thing is, they didn't include trips to big expensive amusement parks and weren't very far away from home. Some of the best trips were when we just got in the car and drove, not really knowing what we were going to do that day. Most of the best trips were our weekend adventures to the North Carolina mountains. I wouldn't trade these days for anything. I wouldn't want cruises or trips to Disney World or weeks at the beach year after year. Part of the fun was the unknown. Most of the fun was simply being together as a family.

So mom and dad, thank you! Thank you for making vacations so fun. They may have been simple. They may have been cheap. You may have gotten sick of watching us at the hotel pool for hours on end and frustrated when we didn't want to do anything but go back to the pool and play, but you did it anyway. You exposed us to new things. You took us places that would teach us to appreciate God's creation. You took us places that would teach us to appreciate history. You took the time to help us appreciate one another. Thank you!

My favorite vacations as a child, and there are many, are my favorite not because of the destination but because of the fun and the time with family. I appreciate my parents for helping me understand that.

When the Blog World and the Real World Meet...

So, today I sent an email to a guy named Ryan Bult. He's the missions pastor at Crosspoint Community Church in Nashville, TN. I sent him an email to ask for some help and guidance on a service trip I'm planning for my students over Fall Break. Their church had participated in a service opportunity at the tent city in Nashville, and I wanted to get some insight from him, and let's just be honest, some help. I became familiar with the church through "blog world." Bring the Rain, the blog of Angie Smith, introduced me to Crosspoint, which in turn introduced me to the blog of their pastor, Pete Wilson, and then the blog of his wife, Brandi Wilson. I listen to Pete's sermon's online on a pretty regular basis and in those sermon's he has referenced Ryan, so that's why I knew to contact him.

In some weird way, though, because I have become familiar with these people through "blog world," they have achieved somewhat celebrity status in my head. I know that sounds crazy and any of the people I've mentioned above would probably laugh out loud if they read that, but it's true. I know they are just regular people, serving God in the ministry to which He has called them, but in my human mind, they are celebrities. So, when I walked back in my office after lunch and saw Crosspoint Community Church show up on the caller ID, I immediately answered. It was Ryan Bult, the celebrity in my mind, calling me! We had a great conversation, and I think he is really going to be a great resource as I continue to prepare for this trip, but in the back of my mind, the whole time, all I could think of was, "I'm talking to Ryan Bult, from Crosspoint!"

I know this is stupid. I even kept telling myself (in my head of course) that this was stupid. But it still excited me to have the "blog world" and the real world meet! It's about as stupid as me crying for five minutes over the Taylor Swift video about her mom that I watched right before I left for lunch. And when I say I was crying, I was crying, hard. And for five minutes after it was over, just trying to explain it to someone else. My friend Kerie thought I was crazy but was immediately more understanding of why I cried at the end of High School Musical 3! At least she got a good laugh.

Anyway, it was just a weird moment but a moment so obviously orchestrated by my Heavenly Father that I was a bit humbled. I am so thankful for "blog world," and I think it and the real world should meet much more often!

Day of Small Things

From the ESV Study Bible Intro to Zechariah: "Under the circumstances, it was easy for the people to conclude that theirs was a "day of small things" (4:10) in which God was absent from his people. In such a context, faithful obedience was viewed by many as useless: pragmatically, it made more sense to pursue to best life possible in spite of the present difficulties."

How culturally relevant is that for today??? I don't really know that this blog has much of a purpose but to flesh out some things I've been thinking about and struggling to understand. I decided to do a little study of the book of Zechariah because of a sermon I heard Sunday night. It's so difficult to truly understand the prophets of the Old Testament until you understand what was going on in their world at the time of writing. As I was reading the introduction, the quote above struck a chord in me.

I've been heartwrenched (don't know if that's a word, but it pretty much describes how I've been feeling) lately over the lack of urgency I have to share my faith with others. I had to call someone the other day to do a reference check for a student. The reference happened to be a pastor in our community. When I finished the business portion of the conversation, this man asked me where I go to church. I answered, and his response was one of utter relief. He said, "Great. Then you're a believer. That's so wonderful." I was a little taken aback by his question and comments and shamefully thought, wow that could be a big turnoff to people. But quickly I realized that this man has it right. He's not afraid to find out where people are in their relationship with Christ. He put it right out there. A positive response from me was not what he was looking for. He was looking for the opportunity to share the love of God with someone who may not know it! I want to have that same sense of urgency. Tonight I struggled with an email I was sending to a friend. I honestly didn't feel like he wanted my God-centered perspective, but I didn't know what else to say. Everything else seemed to fall flat. God's sovereignty and providence were the only words of encouragment that made sense. But why did I struggle in writing that message. This is what I believe with all of my heart. Why don't I have a sense of urgency to share it, both in word and in deed?

I've been heartwrenched lately because I'm seeing so many people who aren't "ready" for God right now. They know about God, but they have no interest in knowing God. This brings me to tears. Like the people in the days of Zechariah, people today find faithful obedience useless and strive to live life to the fullest. Well, I agree that we should live life to the fullest, but the fullest life can only be found in Christ! Why do we all think we have more time? Why is surrender so hard?

We are not living in the "day of small things." We are living in a world where God hears our cries and delivers us from our fears. We are living in a world where God is active, where the Holy Spirit is moving, where God desperately seeks a relationship with us, his creation.

I want to transform my tears to action. I want to transform my heartwrench to love. I want to prove my God and His faithfulness over and over again. I want to sing with my life, "This is my story, this is my song. Praising my Savior all the day long!" God is not absent. God is not distant. God is here! God is alive! God has given us life to live to the fullest...if only we will grab hold of it!

Army Wives is one of my favorite shows on TV. It gives a very entertaining view of what life could be like for those who are married into the military, the struggles they face trying to boost morale, financial struggles, struggles of being left behind for months running a household alone, struggles of being away from your spouse. Last night's episode, however, portrayed something a bit different.

One of the main characters, incidentally a new mother, is about to be deployed to Iraq. She tells her husband that before she goes, she wants to have her baby daughter christened. As she is self-admittedly "not religious" this request takes her husband, who apparently attends church regularly, by surprise. He is elated and agrees to call his pastor. I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised when the pastor arrives to meet with the wife about the christening as he did not waste anytime getting to the heart of her own spiritual health. He even mentioned, shockingly, the importance of having a relationship with Jesus! He didn't do this in a pushy or overbearing way. He simply explained the importance of baptism and the important role that parents have in helping their children grow in their faith. (Side note: I will not get into the fact that infant baptism is an unbiblical practice here, because that is not the point of this blog posting, but it is something of which I am fully aware.) The pastor just asked questions. In fact, the exchange between them went like this.

Pastor: "I am especially eager to hear about your relationship with our Lord."
Joan: "Uh, well, I see, I don't have one actually. As a soldier I have a deep reverence for tradition."
Pastor: "Baptism is more than tradition. It is the cornerstone of our faith."
Joan: "I thought this was about Sarah Elizabeth."
Pastor: "Your daughter will emulate you in walking her own path with Christ. Joan, have you been baptized?"

The scene ends there, but a few minutes later she tells her husband that she felt like she was being interrogated. She said she wanted something more like their wedding where they got to write their own vows and there wasn't so much religion. In fact, as the episode continued, the parents found another church who would perform a dedication of the child. At first, I was excited and surprised they were taking this path, however, then it was explained that the dedication wasn't really about God at all. It was about community.

This didn't surprise me. You see, it fits right into our postmodern culture. People want religion to make them feel good about themselves. They will go to church as long as they don't have to hear anything that questions their goodness. Religion is considered an important part of life, much like being involved in a civic organization. However, hundreds of thousands of people are missing the point. It's not about religion. It's about a relationship with Jesus Christ, exactly what the first pastor on the show said. I don't know why it frustrated me to see the media portray him as being pushy and unreasonable. I should have expected it. But I was so taken aback by his honesty and his mentioning of a relationship with Christ, I was hoping it would turn out differently.

The sad thing is, this character's view is shared by millions of people all across our nation. We are a consumer driven society, and we've transferred that mentality over to our churches. And some churches, in an attempt to grow and some even in an attempt to reach more people for Christ, have fallen right into the trap of consumerism. And it's so easy. We want to measure our success by numbers. We want to measure our success by people's satisfaction with what we offer. It makes sense...from a worldly viewpoint. Not so much from a Godly perspective.

I'm currently reading a book that addresses this challenge facing God's church. It's entitled Franchising McChurch: Feeding the Obsession with Easy Christianity by Thomas White and John M. Yeats. It's a very interesting and thought-provoking read, and I recommend it to anyone involved in church ministry. You can click on the link above to find out more about it.
The authors argue that the church, in an attempt to grow and keep up with an ever-changing society, is or is in danger of falling prey to a McDonald's type mentality. Churches, and the consumers within churches, fall into the trap of measuring their success rates by efficiency, predictability, calculability, and control. While these things can help us understand our effectiveness, relying on one or all of these methods rather than focusing on the Great Commission and the biblical model for the church can quickly draw us from Godly obedience to consumerism.

The quotes below, taken from the book, address the same issues brought up in last night's episode of Army Wives.

"Whatever the spiritual influence, with so many products being offered, the true consumer picks and chooses which product fits his or her given needs during a given moment. With a loss of commitment and no long-term dedication to any institution, the true end of consumer-driven religion is an individual pick-and-choose religion that finds no ties binding one to messy relationships and institutions. p. 141

"The 'happy news' presented at some consumer-driven churches appears to be a magic wand, a talisman, or an additional feature that simply makes living the current life better. For some, God becomes a fairy godmother whom they call upon whenever something new is needed. For others, the gift of God appears to be a bonus offer of eternal fire insurance. So while experiencing all that the world has to offer, they simply add on this 'God thing' to make their experience even better. For others the gospel is like an extra feature on a new car. Although there is nothing wrong with this life and they see no problem that needs fixing, God can enrich the experience and be there just in case He is needed." p. 144

Why we are surprised that this is happening, I don't know. Paul writes to Timothy,

In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge the living and the dead, and in view of his appearing and his kingdom, I give you this charge: Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths. 2 Timothy 4:1-4

As Christians, as members of THE church, we must be ever vigilant in living our lives in such a way that relationship with Jesus is emphasized over religion. We must be diligent in making sure that our churches are preaching the whole Word of God, not just the parts that make people happy or make life seem easy. Jesus even promised that in this world we would have trouble. We must live free, as servants of God. We must live as those who have hope in the One eternal! We must walk the tight rope of speaking the truth in love, even though the world may see it as judgement. We must be careful to steer clear of judgement that is motivated by self-righteousness but never be afraid of speaking God's truth, for we are promised the God's Word will not come back void.

This is a high order. One that can only be fulfilled through a relationship with Jesus, for we are weak. We will falter, but we must remember the words of our Lord to the apostle Paul, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9

Plan to Be Surprised

Yesterday, I went to Gastonia to have lunch with Kristen. Kristen and I went to college together at Mercer, and God saw fit, some years later, to put us together again in the same place at the same time. Our friendship has grown so much since then. As we were outside playing with her soon-to-be four year old son, she asked me,

"Did you ever imagine when we were in college that you would be here playing with my kids?"

My answer was no. But then I followed it up with, "But I don't really remember what I imagined my life would be like." She agreed.

Just a few moments ago, I finished watching the movie Dan In Real Life. He ends the movie with the following narration.

"...life plans, and how we allmake them. And how we hope that our kids make good, smart, safe plans of their own. But if we're really honest with ourselves, our plans don't work out as we'd hoped. So instead of asking our young people, 'What are your plans? What do you plan to do with your life?' maybe we should tell them this...'plan to be surprised.'"

Plans...imaginations...hopes...dreams. I think the movie may have gotten it right. Plan to be surprised! You will be anyway.

I want to live my life with that in mind. I want to plan to be surprised.

Discouragement: What to Do

I recently found myself at the end of the work day feeling very discouraged. Something that I had hoped would happen that day had not, and the feelings of disappointment were overwhelming. I left work, drove home, walked right into the house and grabbed my Bible. I didn’t really know what to do with these feelings. After all, as Christians, we’re not supposed to be discouraged, right? We’re supposed to have the joy of the Lord. And I did, but I also was hurt and a little angry and somewhat in disbelief. And at the moment, those feelings were surfacing much more in my demeanor than the joy of the Lord. I wasn’t quite sure what to do about that, but I knew where the answer could be found.

There was another thought pattern that was bothering me, as well. I knew I had to be at church just a couple of hours after I arrived home. Sadly, I felt an overwhelming need to "deal with" my feelings before I got to church. I didn't want people there to see me like that. What? That makes no sense! None at all! Of all places on the face of the earth, I should feel most comfortable taking off the mask, so to speak, at church. That should be a place I don't have to put on a happy face and smile. Now, I don't mean that churches should be full of people who are sad and/or complaining all the time, but I do feel that it should be a place where people are comfortable sharing their struggles with one another...and that should result in prayer, right then and there. Anyway...

As I dove into God's word, I found great solace in Psalm 34. The words of the psalmist reminded me that my Lord will deliver me from my fears. I learned that the Lord’s ears hear my cry for help. I was relieved to hear once again that I serve a God who can deliver me from my troubles. My favorite verse, verse 18, echoes a verse in Psalm 147. “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” Most importantly, the psalmist’s words reminded me to “taste and see that the Lord is good!” I had forgotten to really see how good my Lord is. I realized that I had put my hope in something other than my heavenly Father that day. I realized that I had put something else on the throne of my heart.

That was the root of my discouragement. I had put my focus and my hope on something that was bound to disappoint. I had to stop beating myself up for feeling that way and surrender my heart and my will, once again, to God. It really is a daily struggle and too often I'm scared to admit that. I guess that's all a part of being authentic, though.

32 Years

I turn 32 today. And if I am completely honest, my life looks nothing like I thought it would at 32, at least as a child.

I never imagined I would have the job I have. In fact, as a child I wanted to be a grocery clerk, teacher, boutique owner, or get this one...full service gas station attendant when I grew up. I also thought I would have appeared on the Price is Right, but that hasn't happened either. But I practiced, believe me! I never imagined I would have the opportunity to help shape the lives of young adults. I never imagined I would have a job where I can use my God-given creativity and encourage people to follow their dreams. I never imagined I would have a job where I get to play for a living! I never imagined I would have a job that I loved going to every day.

I never imagined I would have the friends I have. I also never imagined that I wouldn't be close with friends from childhood, but I must admit that Facebook allows me to at least keep tabs on people with whom I grew up, and that's really nice. I really am blessed to have so many wonderful friends who truly care about me. I have friends I can pray with, laugh with, cry with, be silly with, do crazy things with, and everything in between. I have friends that tell me the truth when I need to hear it, no matter how much it might hurt. I have friends that let me dream. I have friends that buy me lunch each Sunday! I have friends that serve as my family when mine is so far away. I have true friends in all age groups, and my friends keep me grounded. Most importantly, my friends lead me toward the throne of grace

I never imagined I would live here. Growing up, we always took family vacations to Hendersonville/Asheville, North Carolina. Even just for a weekend away, we would pack the car and drive eight hours to the mountains. I never imagined I would live so close. I never imagined I would live right in the midst of the Blue Ridge Mountains. And here I am, right in the middle of God's beauty.

I never imagined I would have the opportunities I have. I get to travel places with my job. I get to help lead worship on Sunday mornings through song! I get to work with incredibly amazing and talented people day in and day out. I have this blog as a forum to share my deepest thoughts, questions, prayers, frustrations, etc. I have a house in which I can entertain and show hospitality to others. I have endless opportunities to serve others.

So while my life is not what I imagined it would be, it is far more than I ever imagined! I can look back over the past 32 years and see how God has painted the tapestry of my life. One experience builds on another. Experiences I had in high school prepared me for experiences I have now. My first real job out of college truly prepared me for the job I have now. There are countless people in my life who have taught me, discipled me, loved me, ultimately shaping me into the person I am now.

When I look back over the last 32 years, I am overwhelmed by the goodness and providence of my Heavenly Father. I am truly thankful that God always has been and forever will be the Author of my life. The words of an old song by the group Truth put it best.

We have come so far

You have been so good

When I trace the road that we have traveled

I gotta tell you Lord

I look at where we are

And see where I could have been

And I need to say again you've been so good

Who would have guessed that we would come so far?